My Confession

My ConfessionSo…. here it is, My dark side and how I got here.Growing up, I discovered my dad Penthouse collection. He kept it in his night stand. I would read them, The girls were so beautiful. The stories were so erotic. I masturbated, I fantasized, maturbated again. But, I was just a teenage boy.In college, I had a great time. Partied, had my share of girls…. What is known today as a “fuck boy”. I was very honest about who I was and what I wanted from them. Also, during this time I slept with a guy. He was one of my best friends. He was gay. I, well It really confused me at times. But in the end, I just used him for sex… sadly looking back I wasn’t honest with him, or myself to be honest. I felt like I couldn’t tell anyone. Toward the end of my time in college I met my first wife. We dated, had a long distance relationship, and I moved to be with her. We dated a long time, I didn’t have a real career, istanbul escort and I wanted to buy her the big ring, have a “real job”, etc… I loved her, and she was beautiful, strong, and smart. I always felt like she was going to leave me… in the end, I left her… But during that time, I discovered adult book stores. My first experience in one, They had booths…. I was exploring the booths… there was a couple of other guy wandering around in there. It was all so new, crazy, exciting to me. One of the guys told me to “check out this piticular Booth, he said the movies lasted longer in there than the others, so I checked it. Next thing I know, I am rubbing my self through my pants cause of this hot lesbo scene, and there is this light knock on the door, I say…”someone is in here”… and he responds “let me in”. I say “go away” avcılar escort . Kind of confused I keep going in the booth and now my dick is in my hand. Knock on the door again.. “comon, let me in…” I crack open the door. It’s the same guy, young Latin guy, good looking. He literally looks into my eyes, then down to see my dick I my hand. Then he pushes his way in and grabs my cock. I say “wait”, and before anything else comes out he is on his knees sucking my cock. Few minutes later he takes my whole load. After that, I am hooked, various book stores, there’s even a theater. Like an real theater that was a legit theater at one time, that was my favorite place. So seedy and nasty, but I was in there weekly. Sometimes I just jerked off, sometimes I got jerked or sucked. I would go strip clubs, nice ones, not so nice, etc. I loved it, but at the same time I was ashamed şirinevler escort of myself.Eventually through all this I married and got divorced. And eventually started a career. And eventually met someone new and remarried. But, this part of me that liked the porn found internet porn…. now I didn’t have to go to Adult Book Stores, buy magazines from disapproving clerks. And I am sure you know, if you have enough time on your hands, you can go down some dark holes in the world of internet porn. But, after a while… it isn’t enough. So, here I am now. Now I have fantasies about sharing my wife. About watching her take on a few guys while she is strapped down. Cause I was the one her strapped her down. She is doing it for herself as much for me. After they have her way with her, she can barely move from being fucked so hard in every orifice in her body. I unstrap her. Kiss her. Tell her how beautiful she is and how much I love her. I kiss every part of her body. She taste of sweat and cum. Her swollen pussy is sensitive as I clean the cum out. She orgasims as I do my duty. She shutters, she smiles as tears run from her eyes…. And now I know…. her dark side is awake. She wants more as I do…. but part of her is ashamed… like the part of me.